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Being a wife cum student is…..

It feels surreal… everything that has been going on. I’ve prepared all my life for this and yet, it still feels unprepared. Being a wife and a student cannot be more of a dream come true for me.

Hi all! Welcome and thank you for tuning in. This is my personal blog and seeing you here makes my heart flutter with joy. I hope that this post brings you insights as well as brighten up your day as you go through it.

Ahh, you read the title right. I am officially and happily a wife now! Yaay, right? It happened so fast I couldn’t even invite you to the wedding. I will narrate the story in another post tho.

But now that I am a wife, I feel like everything is pleasant and wonderful than before. I feel more responsible and more familial 🤭 than I have ever been.

Adding to that, I am a wife cum student too.

I have double duties and double joy all the more. So, this joy is now uncontainable and I somehow am on the sidewalk, writing this to you all. Wanna see?

So… here’s something I’ve learnt.

I cannot just sit idly at home and wait for my husband to come to me. What do I do with all the spare time? And what do I do home alone?

Also, I didn’t want my marriage life to be a boring one. I want to make it fun. I want to have fun. Even if that means having fun all by myself. He is off to work, and I haven’t secured a job myself.

Here’s what I did instead:

1. When we get up, I get myself super busy with house chores. That leaves him a little less chores to complete in the morning.

2. After I’m done with all that, I, either, get him all prepared and dressed up for the day, or I get dressed up and leave home together

3. My day starts after he leaves home. So I would open my To-Do app and write down things I planned to do. Sometimes there are 3 and sometimes 13. I just cannot get myself to not use the app. Here’s what it looked like:

4. After I tick off some tasks, I take a break and chill for atleast 20 mins.

5. And I repeat. After ticking off all the house chores and Today’s, I move on to my assignments task. It kinda looks like this:

And then I do some social media stuff and end my day when he reaches home.

I say that cuz when he comes home, it’s not his time or my time anymore but our time. And we spend our time together, doing absolutely nothing but making our today’s stories come alive.

Oh and we would talk until dinner and go to sleep.

Haha. As simple as it sounds, I feel like I am juggling work like a clown. I am a happy clown if that is all it takes. 🤭

Thank you for reading. If you liked it or could relate to it, do comment below.

See you next upload! 🙋🏽‍♀️

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Connect more with communication

Bonjour mes amis!

I was just wondering of all of you when I wrote this. How you would be open to chew this in and how many things would have a different meaning if I would say anything wrong here. But I am also full of hope that this will be a big impact on your lives and your loves (work, parenting, applies to all that you love to do, your passion, your desires)

What I want to talk about is something I very much lack it, at first, I thought, “Heck no! I can’t be diving into this headfirst. This is way too hard to accomplish in a lifetime”, but! Looking at the benefits of it, it is very much likely that I stop my thinking for a bit and listen to what it has in store for me and us.

What do you do when you are an introverted person, face gets red when someone breathes your air and gets uncomfortable when you are being spotlighted? Well, I just explained me there! The same is with me as well. I get all comfy to talk with individuals but dang, it cringes when somebody calls out my name in a group to talk about a specific topic. Oh! How the volume would minimize itself until it’s inaudible.

But here we are, talking about goals beyond our comfort zone. Here we are, wanting to make a difference by doing the first thing that would take away heartbeats from us. Why? Because there is nothing in this world that can stop us if we are passionate enough to let others be mutually influenced as we are. Somewhere somehow, you look at that TedTalk and want to be like them too, somewhat somewhen, you see someone you look up to talk about life, and you want to do that as well, but arrghh! This inability to speak our minds out. How do we do that then if we are too comfy in our pajamas, looking from afar the ability of others but aren’t able to do anything about it at the least?

I would like to share about my experience (again, cuz life is too boring to not take up opportunities when given). How some of the tips I will mention below helped me better communicate with strangers and people in general. You can also add in the comments, what your thoughts on these points are, your experience, or even your points to aid future readers as well.

Here are the points noted that helped me overcome this mountain and be free-flowing and smooth as communications should be.

  1. Think of your WHY? Why you react as such. Why your mouth shuts when it is time? Why so on and so forth.

    My why was: Why do I shut myself when something is ought to be talked about?
    A: Uncomfortable | Nervous | Dislike | Sad | Angry but don’t want to show it | Probed too often

  2. Next up, think about one instance that you could have done better if you had it full on! It can be your an argument with friends or family, it can also be raising your hand in the class when you know the answer.

    I thought of an instance where I had an uncomfortable situation with my fiancée but I didn’t say a word about it. (I know, crazy right? I can’t just open up to ANYONE)
  3. Then after that, try to pretend that you are in the same situation and make use of the following points while doing so:
    • Take a deep breath, and analyze the situation.
    • Buy some time for you to clear your mind and spirit (all of the hate and resentment if you do have😁)
    • Ask for clarification (also part of buying time but then this could also make you more aware of what there is to talk about.
    • Choose what kind of tone you would communicate through
    • Calm yourself. Look away for a while and then come back
  4. After all of this, you will also need to mention the following in the conversation. Here they are:
    • What I know: State to the person what you understand from it and let them know what you think of it.
    • What I do not know: State to the person about what you are not sure of, your doubts and your unclears.
    • How I will find out: (This is why you need to buy some time so you could come back with better composure of words and information) Tell the person the way(s) you will deal with it or that you will research on.

This is how you will make sure that you are at the least communicating well. In some time I will also do a part two on this but I am hanging up until here now.

Let me know if this helps, would love to hear your thoughts on it 🙂

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10 steps to self-reflecting

Howdy!

So, last week was a very busy week. Wondering why? (Do check out my previous blogs if you haven’t done so) Well, because there was so much to do in so less time. I had taken a one week “self-reflection time” off from work. Without even knowing, I had three more days left for the self-reflection thingy. I had no idea how time flew past that quick. But luckily, I learnt something from it about my self, some things that I wouldn’t have if I didn’t take a week off from work.

Wanna know how it went? Read on ahead! 😊

I had a hard time figuring out what to do with my time throughout the week but hey, I am young and it’s like a must for me to procrastinate! Actually, that was the first thing on my list. Procrastinate! Haha, weird enough.

This is just from my perspective and what I had learnt last week during my self-reflection time. Not saying that these are the have-to rules for everyone here but, for those of you who really think you have walked past yourself and couldn’t catch up anymore, here’s some ideas for you to self-reflect on:

  1. Take one of your favorite notebook and your pens(Yes! be creative with multicolored pens )
  2. Go to your secret place or somewhere quiet. Do carry your headphones if you are going somewhere quite noisy
  3. Flight-mode your phone. This is important so that you won’t get distracted while you work on your self-reflection. You can still listen to music, even if your phone is on flight-mode. Here is some music to listen to while you reflect.
  4. Open the first page of your notebook, and start writing. Write whatever you feel at the moment, your thoughts, emotions, write up as much as you can. Fill one more page of that and then you read. Read what you wrote and examine yourself whether this is who you are. Through those writings, begin to notice a lovely writer writing a love letter and expressing how much it means to be alive daily.
  5. Ahh! How good it does feel to have written all of the things in your brain-dump page. Now, you move on to the next page and let yourself be pampered with “What am I good at?”. The first impression is the best impression they say, so your first impression of this self-reflection journey can be why I love myself. Write down all of the things you love about yourself. The smell of your hair or socks, it can be as awkward as it is, since I don’t judge me. If you can’t think of anything yet, just try coming up with some points, around 3 to 4 at the least.
  6. Now, you’re done with impressing yourself. You can then start with, what don’t I like about myself/ Things I need improvement on and things like that (remember that the goal is to impress yourself, so don’t write words like “Why I hate myself”, if you did, you wouldn’t even reach the 5th point). Again, it can be the smell of your hair or your socks, not judging (cuz I can’t see 😂)
  7. Would you look at that! You have completed half of what it is there for your self-reflection. I am so proud of you (yes, proud of you who read till the 7th point without doing nothing as well😉) Here can you begin the harder part. Ask yourself the following questions:
    • Where do I see myself in 5 years?
    • What can I do now that will impact my future?
    • How do I change my habits so that my future self will be more lovely and have a good heart?
    • Where do I spend my money?
    • Where do I spend my time?
    • Why am I still doing what I am doing?
    • What is my maturity level?
  8. After that, you can focus on your love life. What you want to do better or what you could do to make it blossom even more. Then go on to your jobs and businesses, think what you could do. This is because you need to focus on yourself first, your self-growth, your self-love, everything that helps you grow and prosper!
  9. Well, I know I said ten steps, but I would like to leave one point for your creative you 🤗 The last thing you would want to do is close the notebook with your best bookmark or a page-holder, literally; and just look through it at the end of every week. Self-reflection is something that you do regularly. It can’t be done in a day or a week 😏
  10. Here you go! Add on and groooowwww!

Okay, so I hope you find these tips helpful and do note this please: This page may contain affiliate links. If you click on my affiliate link and make a purchase, I would receive a small commission at no additional cost to you.

Let me know what you think of it. Would love to hear what you think ❤